I’m tired of the debate about this word. I never even knew the word existed until I was in high school. My parents never used it. No one we associated with used it.
No one needs to use it.
I’ve heard both sides of the issue about why it should not be used and why some rappers and comedians use it. It’s something about claiming the word and using it takes the power of the word away. And somehow that empowers those the word is intended to hurt.
That’s fine if those using it lived in a vacuum. They do not. They live in a world where small children will surely hear that word, unaware of the history of it or its insulting connotations. That creates even more problems. I know this first hand.
Two of my sons have had black friends. They were all frequent visitors here. My youngest son, Levi, was quite young at the time and like any kid that age was like a sponge, soaking up everything he heard and saw. And naturally, he adored his older brothers and their friends.
And so, when these black kids used the “N” word, I would cringe, knowing Levi was nearby and listening. I knew the debate; I knew that this white woman’s opinion might not be welcome. But it was my house, after all. And it was my kid being affected.
And then it happened. My little Levi, barely 3 years old, said the “N” word in front of a couple of Jesse’s friends. They stopped in mid sentence, unable to speak. They weren’t angry at Levi; they knew exactly where he’d heard that word. They knew that they had been this child’s teachers.
I never heard the boys using that word after that. I didn’t have to address the issue, either. Those 18 year old boys had been given a valuable lesson from a 3 year old child. They got to see how their words are important, how their words do impact those around them.
And that is why I believe there is no appropriate time nor place for that word. If you don’t want to teach it to the next generation, don’t use it. Even a small child can understand that.